Friday, November 16, 2007

Something new

It all got so monotonous so I decided to change...contemplation was so cliched so I thought deliberations could bring out something new. The template is also changed and the comments thing is back and the cbox is gone...blah blah---its an outcome of boredom plus a reason to break out of lethargy.

Its the start of winter- I love them, the fog the warm sweaters and jackets and shoes and coffee mugs and blankets. Its all so amazing. Time is flying man!!!
I really have to pace up with my novel now- theres hardly time left and not even done halfway through it.
Sons and Lovers by D.H. Lawrence, I think only literature students get to read stuff like this. But I like it- its about family, about love and Oedipus complex.
It sometimes delights me to be a literature student, its gives you an edge. Your critque level increases and you start finding the smallest of doubts in everything you see. You start thinking how better something can get. You start speaking splendid words in the normal spoken language, you get to read the popular stuff. And you'll come across a lotta Williams- there'll be atleast one William in every novel or play. You'll start relating yourself to the characters. You'll abuse Shakespeare at least once.

My internals are less than a month away now and soon there'll be the externals and soon BANG...end of my college. I'm not cribbing because, well, I have spent the last 3 yrs brooding to why am I in this college? But then friends and the fun will be missed - I guess thats what college is about. Shradha told me a few days ago that I changed her- in a good way! I felt soo happy...I wanted to tell her that she changed me too. She taught me that being a bitch sometimes is GOOD...and yes it is!!! Not that I'm a bitch or she's a bitch but when we have to We should always be one. She taught me to be real- that's when my melodrama cracks out and I become over-sensitive. I taught her to be equal to what people do to you.

Oedipus Complex is basically a crap theory if you read it or listen to it but in literal meanings its an art of writing a novel and understanding lOVE- in whichever form it maybe. its all about acceptance.
Remember in Dil Chahta Hai when Sid slaps Akash because he made fun of Sid's love with a woman who's the age of his mother. That's okay.
Oedipus is about a love between a mother and son, its an obsession of a mother for her son that she never lets any girl enter his life.
thats what happens in Sons and Lovers. Paul, the son, is in love with a girl Miriam but the presence of the tension on his mothers face due to this breaks him down and he can't confess his love for Miriam.

He did not know himself what was the matter. He was naturally so young, and their intimacy was so abstract, he did not know he wanted to crush onto his breast to ease the ache there. He was afraid of her. The fact that he might want her as a man wnats a woman had in him been supressed into shame. When she shrank in her convulsed, coiled torture from the thought of such a thing, he had winced to the depths of his soul. And now this 'purity' prevented even their first love kiss. It was as if she could scarcely stand the shock of physical love, even a passionate kiss, and then he was too shrinking and sensitive to give it............

after one paragraph...

.......he hated her, for she seemed, in some way, to make him despise himself.

To how it hurts when both of them know they are in love but the strangeness of love is such that it can't always allow you to rise. Love has its own principles.

I watched Dil dosti etc. its a different thing altogether, a bold thing....but I liked what it teaches.
One lives for Love, one dies for Love. Both ways the Love has different meanings. But in the end we hear from Apurv (the casanova) that he missed Vaishali the most (the prostitute).

Love is mystical.

Monday, November 12, 2007

All 'that' stuff...

My brain doesnt bother to move a step ahead and think more these days, all its stuck on is my future- which seems to be in the dark. I think all my blogs and my talks sound the same and thats why most of the listeners around me yawn pretty often. My useles head has given up thinking...and I have become boring. Waise when it comes to speaking, I'm quite unstoppable, I remember people used to say to me 'tu chup kab rehti hai', though that was back in school, now I'm a lil quieter than the usual me. Speaking is fun.

Diwali's gone..gone..gone. you know suddenly everything becomes so quiet n all but this diwali was fun and I became rich on bhaiya dooj and since then I have a smile on my face. money talks baby!!
There are some super fundu people bothering me these days- actually they aren't, but I just feel like that there existence is quite enough a botheration to me, though I'm not exactly in touch with them but they deserve to KNOW what I can do. This is actually not too much of a deal to me but eh I'm hell bored today.

I have fallen in deep love----with my phone and that too after getting a super cool software in it- ahmm its a dictionary and a thesaurus and its better than my big fat dictionary. lame? so?? i love it. hehe
I mixed up the meaning of pretentious and precarious today. They don't really have anything in common except for the letter p.

I dunno what am I so hyper abt???!!??

ah... ingepo (tamil gudbye i suppppose)

Try Saying This Rapidly and Continuously:

Cheap ship trip.

Wednesday, November 07, 2007


In happiness, in pain, in love, in agony and in "whatever".

The first year of happy blogging completed.
Aaaaaaand its been good. No, Grrreat!!
Afterall Li'l Miss Priyanka could do something.

Initially writing down something on broadband, which, by the way, the whole world could see, was too much an ordeal for me (not that they were waiting.blah.). I plunged myself into a pretentious mission and made a blog. Well, here it is, not any different than the scraps I used to have in a torn diary but only better. Those tit bits are now fit into a well formulated blog. I enjoy writing, reading and I enjoy what it brings into me. It tells me that I can be better, teaches me that I can be good and worse at the same time which is good in its own way. It makes me hang on to the memories which might just get lost in my brain otherwise. Its anyways full of gibberish. It gives me strength to be creative.

I'm a happy blogger.

So here goes a cheers to, uh- well, me and my blog!

Saturday, November 03, 2007

Now, Don't you call that a SMILE!!!

I feel like I'm in 7th std. again- the way I got crazy for a Hrithik when he was new.

But just to console myself I look at this guys face and then say "bahut ho gaya". You know Im a grown up now. But just loook at him. where do you have such guys? he should be preserved sumwhere just to be looked at. Masha-allah!

I told Mom yesterday to find me husband like him..hehe...n she was like you are crazyy!!

Anyways- I saw Jab we met. Its a crazzzzyyy movie. very cute. Kareena is looking good. even Shahid for tht matter. He's been himself for the first time.

The music of saawariya is soo soothing. also hear the song in jab we met called tumse hi...its beautiful and much better if you're in love!

Tumse hi din hota hai

surmayi shaam aati hai

tumse hi tumse hi....

FUCK title!!!!

Why is life reminding me everyday thats its gonna be hell out there....
I just wanna cry...mannn what the hell am I supposed to do. Lately I realised that whats the harm in being a lecturer?? isn't it? wont it be cool?

I love English but do I love it to that extent? And would I (in extra capital bold) be doing an M.phil n Phd??? ( ha ha )

  • Journalism has gone down the drain
  • MBA is like the only thing that "pays".
  • PG courses have lost value. read the above line again.
What else
  • UK is too expensive.
  • USA needs 16 years of Education, We Indians just have 15.
  • Australia is just desperate. period.
So, I just wanna saw WOW....