Tuesday, March 02, 2010

What happens next...

And so I am back to my blog when everything seems to have turned away from me and I have nothing to do. I love updating statuses on Facebook, but I hate admitting to the somewhat 200 friends I have on FB that I am having a bad time. I somehow like to project only cooler things on facebook- I admit, I'm a big flaunter.

Well, I'm not typically in a worst case scenario right now but I'm also not exactly happy.
  1. Away from family
  2. Missing the festivals (this is not a worthy point to be in this list though, n yet its no. #2)
  3. Unemployed and Cashless
  4. Stuck in London (which still means that I hate this city)
  5. The most expensive city
  6. Wanting to go back but have no effin clue why I am still here.
  7. Staying in a crappppppppppy house, with the crappiest of people
  8. Well, this could be an infinite list.
Facebook has become my only sense of social interaction these days with Farmville and Cafe World doing up a bit to keep me "involved". I sit in my box room the rest of the time and watch random shit on my laptop, which I am assuming would crash any day (touchwood!).

I sometimes wonder, Am I a bad person? I talk to myself some days and figure out things I have done in the past, do they really make a difference for your future? Does Karma really work? There are so many people I know who are successful and HAPPY in their life, and get everything they want, just like that! why??? HOW??? WHY?? I know cursing them won't help really but I need clarification.

I called up Sahil a few hours ago and told him about my stupid interview in London and he was like Awww don't cry don't be sad. I wasn't crying and neither was I sad. For the first time in my life I think I might've showed him that "I CAN take shit!" attitude of mine. I told him what'll happen if I cry, no ones going to come running up with a job for me. The whole world is trying so I'll join em and TRY.

I am tired of trying. And I am not even anticipating on what happens next!



The Phoenix said...
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The Phoenix said...

oho aisa kya ho gaya? 'Bad person' no u r not! Don't lose heart so soon, there is plenty of things to do in the world. Look at me, its been a year, I know time pulls u down but people who love u pull u back. So stop emphasizing on people who don't matter to u. F them.